Kurts Weblog

Dealing with Anger (forgiveness)
September 1, 2008, 8:41 pm
Filed under: Trusting in the Lord | Tags: , ,

Anger in relationships that is our topic. There are a lot of things that can contribute to anger and the practice of forgiving can be powerful tool. Unresolved anger can kill a relationship. Here are some scriptures to help with understanding what God has laid out for us.
Ephesians 4:26-27 “In your anger do not sin” Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold.
James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Philippians 3:13 Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,

Forgiving once and for all sometimes happens. But much of the time it is a repetitive, time after time again, practice. Trust me I’m still working on this one. My wife will tell me time and time again not to do something but I do it anyways. I will again ask for forgiveness and slowly move forward with our relationship.

Jesus showed us about forgiving by answering Peters question of how many times must I forgive my brother 7 times?  ”7 times 70” was Jesus’ answer. This means that however many times it takes but to always forgive. Another phrase I used to hear growing up was “forgiveness is divine” never really thought much about it, just thought it was a good phrase at the time.

 Lets distinguish forgiveness from reconciliation.
Forgiving leads to reconciliation “” In reconciliation the offender is in repentance of an offense and seeking forgiveness. Forgiveness is possible if reconciliation “a relationship put back on track” is not possible. Knowing in your heart and from their heart the forgiveness is genuine is a great feeling in itself.
Forgiveness dose not mean we pick up where we left off like it never happened. Trust must be rebuilt. Forgiveness is more like starting over trusting in stages and trying not to let the offense get in the way. Keep in mind this is not excusing anything, especially if the offense has a motive behind it. Excusing someone may be similar to forgiveness in that it may be an expression of grace to another but it is not the same as forgiveness. Forgiveness is most complete when both understand the offense. We need to know that seeking the justification of penalties for what was done, we have freely pardoned them. Now we have chosen to move forward with the relationship and start on the road to rebuilding trust.

Study notes taken from Solving the Real Love in the Real World, by Gary Smalley and Dr. Bob Burbee

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